Kid-Friendly Language

Crap.

Sucks.

Butt.

Fart.

I really don’t want my little kid saying any of these words, but I say them sometimes without thinking. I’ve been using this year of infant-hood to practice replacing these undesirable terms with sweeter words, words that are cute coming from a two-year-old. Frankly, I don’t want him saying, “Crap!” when he drops a Cheeto on the ground. That’s not even slightly cute. I’d much rather him say, “Aw, nuts!” Now isn’t that cute? Yep.

And does it suck? Nope. It’s a bummer.

Is that his butt? Nope. Bottom.

Fart? Oh no. He doesn’t fart, and neither does anyone else. The best word is toot. (And then we say excuse me. I’m already working on that with him every time he toots!)

These are all much sweeter and more toddler-appropriate terms, and frankly, they sound a lot nicer coming out of my mouth than the previous words anyway! This isn’t much of a post, but it was on my mind. So what words would you have to or have you had to eliminate from your vocabulary when hanging out with little ones?

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Hormones

Q: How do you make a hormone? 

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A: Don’t pay her! 

HAHAHAHA okay, sorry. That was probably inappropriate, but I couldn’t resist. Anyway.

It’s no secret that along with pregnancy come unpredictable hormones. In my first trimester, I was pretty weepy about just about everything. (Example: I burst into tears on the way to work as this song played on the radio. Because, you know, the love between the doggies at the end was just so sweet.) Things kind of evened out during my second trimester, and I was feeling much more like myself. Now that I’m solidly into my third, however, I’m noticing some inconvenient hormonal reactions again. This time, however, I’m also noticing some sinister activity that I didn’t notice before.

I’m nervous. Scared. Terrified. I am 33½ weeks pregnant, and there’s no going back. This child is going to rip through my *ahem*, and it’s not going to be pretty. (Beautiful, miraculous, amazing — okay, but not pretty.) And it’s gonna HURT! I’m scared of the needles, the poking and prodding and checking private areas, and that’s before you even get to the pushing. I saw a video of a doctor breaking a woman’s water and OH LORD I hope my water breaks on its own. I hope everything happens the way it should, Bennett does what he should, my cervix does what it should, and the epidural — please, Jesus — does what it should.

But what if it doesn’t? What if? What if? What if? I worked myself into a frenzy the other day with these fears. Worries. Anxiety. Bawling. I’m not ready; I can’t do this; it’ll be horrible… and don’t even get me started on breastfeeding. I’m scared about that, too. What if…?

Anyway, I was having a pretty emotional day that day to begin with. The last thing I should have been doing is thinking about Bennett’s birth day and watching other babies’ birth days on the interwebs. But I did. And then I couldn’t stop thinking about it and worrying about it and feeling inadequate.

Not surprisingly — although I failed to recognize it at the time — the enemy was all over that. My thoughts were consumed by all this negativity, by all these feelings of inadequacy and what ultimately boiled down to my not trusting God. Scriptures tried to poke through, but I just dismissed them with a, “Yeah, I know, but what if???” I chose to give in to the enemy and to dwell in these thoughts instead of resting in God’s love and strength. What started as a normal hormonal imbalance brought on by pregnancy turned into an occasion for temptation, and I gave in. It turned into sin.

Yesterday, something else happened that got me all anxious and planted a very small and unreasonable seed of negativity. It was quite a battle, but I sought the Lord and refused to let the enemy take over my thoughts any more than he already had. Here is how God encouraged me:

When my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.
~ Psalm 94:19

For You are my hope; O Lord GOD, You are my confidence from my youth. By You I have been sustained from my birth; You are He who took me from my mother’s womb; my praise is continually of You.
~Psalm 71:5-6

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things.
~Philippians 4:6-8

God led me into victory against the enemy, because I chose to listen to Him. It was really hard to listen to Him, though, because the anxiety and the “What ifs” were so strong. Still, I persisted. I lost the first battle, but won this one.

I think as women, it’s easy to blame hormones for our bad behavior. That’s because it’s extra-easy to allow our hormones to lead us into bad behavior. This isn’t only the case during pregnancy; adolescence, PMS, and menopause mess with our hormones, too. These times bring about legitimate challenges that upset our emotions and, therefore, our way of thinking. This is largely out of our control. Still, we are responsible for our choices and our actions, even when the temptation is terribly strong.

Sin is sin, regardless of how in balance — or imbalanced — your hormones may be at any given moment. I can’t believe that I’m 29 and just realizing that this is yet another opportunity for the enemy to gain a foothold. Don’t let him. Saturate your mind with Scripture. It’ll help you immensely and really, really aggravate him. (That’s kinda fun.)

No People Day

(Shout out to all the introverts out there! Woot!)

Last week was a very difficult one for me. It was difficult in large part just because I’ve officially entered the uncomfortable leg of my pregnancy. I’m having a lot of trouble sleeping. I had two really, really terrible nights of extremely little sleep, and the rest were just so-so. Lack of rest–and probably hormones; let’s just be honest–definitely intensified the stress of what ultimately turned into an overly social week for me. By Thursday night, I was a hot mess. Friday morning, I groggily declared to myself and to my husband that it would be a No People Day.

No People.←

There had been too many people already.  Every single day had had people in it, and it was exhausting.

You see, for the introvert, social activities are more draining. This doesn’t mean we don’t like people or that we don’t want to see our friends and family. This just means that if we’re doing that all the time, and we’re not getting the alone time needed to refresh and recharge, we’ll come to our breaking point. It’s kind of the same as the extrovert being forced to sit at home alone for a week. I, the introvert, would welcome a week like that. The extrovert would go crazy. So we’re really the same, just opposite! God made us both.

So yes, I needed a No People Day on Friday. It was lovely! I wasted a lot of time, sure, because I was so sleep deprived. But I also got to do a little (sadly, non-novel) writing and some reading. Caught up a little on tasks that had been left undone. Totally ignored my phone any time it rang (such freedom! I didn’t even look!), and made no plans with anybody. That is how an introvert recharges. I felt so much better by the end of the day!

And now I’m ready for people again, because I *do* love my people! If my No People Day affected you–as in you got ignored for a little while–it is not personal! If you were one of my people in my full o’ people week–as in you and I hung out at some point and now you’re feeling a little lousy and, frankly, a little grumpy at me–it is not personal! I’ll say it again: I love my people. I’m just an introvert. I made the mistake of not saying no or of not choosing a better day a couple of times. That’s my own fault for filling up my own schedule the way I know I shouldn’t have.

If you’re an introvert, be encouraged. It’s okay to say no sometimes. Don’t let yourself reach your breaking point.

And to finish up a very rambling post, here’s something awesome I found:

(You can get this design on a T-shirt, but it sure seems like it would draw a lot of attention to the introvert wearing it…)

I Have an Announcement!

I no longer have a Wal-Mart cell phone! No, I didn’t get a smarty-pants phone, or a phone made just for “i,” but it definitely came from the cell phone store! And guess what?

It

can

take

PICTURES!

I’ve never had a cell phone that could take pictures before. That’s just neato. Now my little wiggle-worm’s sonogram face is my phone wallpaper; how awesomely cool.

OH! And I can receive pictures without having to go online to access your “Multimedia Message” by typing in the longest, most random code of numbers, letters, and symbols ever! (By the way, I usually just didn’t. I’ve missed a lot of pictures you’ve sent over the years… sorry.)

AND ANOTHER THING! I have a qwerty keypad on my phone. It’s taking some getting used to, because I have spent the last–I don’t know, 12-13 years or so?–texting on the regular phone keypad with T9 predictive text. (I am awesome at it, by the way.) I’m catching on pretty quickly to the tiny keyboard, since I’m obviously very familiar with the regular keyboard, but I have never typed with just my thumbs before… It’s weird. But cool!!!

All in all, I feel pretty darn fancy right about now.

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(It’s pink!)